Cuppa Chaos
Cuppa Chaos is a large cold brew with sneakers, a skateboard and enough energy to make the rest of Glonk City look stationary.
Nobody knows exactly how a cup of coffee became sentient. Cuppa has never stayed still long enough to participate meaningfully in the investigation.
Highly Caffeinated. Possibly Too Highly.
There are several competing theories about the origin of Cuppa Chaos.
The most popular involves an electrical storm, an industrial espresso machine and a quantity of concentrated cold brew that local authorities have declined to specify. Cuppa considers origin stories boring and would rather know what everyone is doing next.
He does not sleep. More importantly, he does not understand why anyone else does. Nighttime, as far as Cuppa is concerned, is simply daytime with shorter lines.
Cuppa can usually be found skating through the city, building something, racing something, delivering something or beginning a new project before anybody has established what happened to the previous project.
His attention moves quickly, but his loyalty does not. If one of his friends needs help, Cuppa is already moving before the sentence is finished.
Whether that makes the situation better immediately is another question.
Powered by Questionable Decisions
Cuppa Chaos Loves
- Cold brew
- Skateboarding
- Sunrise
- Midnight
- Building things
- Races
- Starting the next project immediately
Cuppa Chaos Does Not Understand
- Decaf
- Standing still
- Slow elevators
- Waiting until tomorrow
- Meetings about meetings
- Closing time
- The phrase “maybe later”
Cuppa Chaos Facts
Friends, Teammates & People Trying to Keep Up
Glonky
The rare citizen who hears one of Cuppa’s ridiculous ideas and responds with an even more ridiculous idea. They should probably be supervised.
Pigeon G
Excellent source of things that need doing immediately. G prefers that Cuppa stop asking whether anything else needs doing immediately.
Trash Panda
Supplier of wheels, wires, brackets, mystery components and nearly everything required for Cuppa’s latest build.
Gnomeo
Cuppa genuinely values his advice and therefore listens carefully for almost seven consecutive seconds.
When the Crew Needs Momentum, Add Coffee.
Cuppa Chaos is the crew’s accelerator. Once a clue has been found, a plan suggested or a destination identified, Cuppa is usually the reason everybody stops talking about it and starts moving.
His speed, enthusiasm and complete absence of hesitation make him invaluable when time matters. They also ensure that every adventure has at least one moment when Gnomeo closes his eyes and quietly asks why nobody thought this through first.
We can sleep when we’re done.
Actually, you can sleep. I’ve got another idea.